Orange Girls

by Adam PC

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Recorded and mixed at Guv Studios, Roslindale, MA
Mastered by New Alliance, Cambridge, MA

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released March 25, 2012

Recorded and Mixed by Adam P. Cissell

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Adam PC Boston, Massachusetts

Adam PC is a rock band from Boston, MA specializing in catchy tunes and BS.

The band began as the solo project of Adam Preston Cissell, who released two albums, Townie Does (2008) and Entendo Tapes (2009) on his own before asking the rest of the band members to join and play shows together live. As a full band, they recorded and released Orange Girls in March, 2012. ... more

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Track Name: Yeah Fuckin' A Right!
I’m not trying to be impatient, but I think we should go
to a bar that has a jukebox, where it’s not too full.
I’m not trying to be too cool. I just want to have fun.
So, can we go to some shit-hole, bullshit bar where we can do what we want?

Damn! This place is just not quite right.
Say goddamn, man! Yeah fuckin’ A right!

Ok, we’ll close out our tab after this round of Bass.
This place wasn’t that bad, but it was still kinda “mnlaah”.
Here, I just looked up this other place. See, it’s right here on my phone.
Looks like a real townie hell-hole.

Damn! I’m kinda feeling alright!
Say goddamn, man! Yeah fuckin’ A right!
Track Name: Fat Goths at Denny's
I’m here, yet again, because one of my friends suggested at approximately 2:10 a.m. that we eat after we drink, before we sleep. It’s how we round out our week.
So, we shuffle in the booth, look at the menus, order a round of coffee, because it makes sense to drink coffee after whiskey after whiskey.

And what’s with these fat goths at Denny’s, man?!
They’re eyeing me down like I’m ruining their meal.
Dude, what’s the deal with all these fat goths at Denny’s, man?!
Stop killing our buzz with your rolled-eyes!
Just enjoying your Grand Slam and your fucking sides!

We’re sitting at the table just spoiling ourselves on breakfast foods and, man, what the hell?
They keep staring and staring and judging and judging.
The waitress comes over and says, “Guys, can you keep it down?”
And I say, “For who? For that fucking kid?
“What’s he doing here? Where are his parents? You’re ten years old!

“And you’re a fat goth at Denny’s, man!”
You keep eyeing us down like we’re ruining your meal.
Dude, what’s the deal with all these fat goths at Denny’s?! Seriously?!
Just calm the fuck down. It’ll be ok. Can I please just enjoy my goddamn eggs?!

I’m starting to fear that our time has grown short.
The wait staff has turned on us and most certainly will kick us out.
And, I’m sorry about stacking up our dishes as high as we could.
And, I’d like to apologize to everyone in here that we might have offended including our gothic friends.
I feel we got started on the wrong foot.

So, this one’s for my fat goths at Denny’s, man!
I’m sorry about earlier. I was kind of drunk, and I was kind of a dick. Hey don’t roll your eyes at me, man!
I was trying to be nice. Hey, I was trying to apologize. Well, you? You can go fuck yourself, man!

I didn’t mean that. I’m sorry, it’s been a long night. Yes, we’re leaving. We’re leaving!
Sorry about everything. Sorry about the sugar packets. That was not the intent. Can I just get my coat?
Well, it’s pretty cold. Ok, yes, we’re going!
Track Name: Get About Right
Going over to a friend’s house. Gonna pregame-it. Gonna get about right.
Gotta half-pack smokes, couple’a road sodas. Gonna get about right!
I’m half-done with this one, but, fuck yeah, I’ll take another! I’ll get about right!
Yeah, man, I already ate. Had a liquid-dinner. Gettin’ about right!

Get about right!
My knee is bleeding from dancing with an imaginary box. Got about right.

Got into it with a bouncer, walked six miles home. That’s about right.
Track Name: Attainable Chicks
I’m talking to a girl who’s from Atlanta.
We keep talking about the fucking Braves.
She’s not that hot, but then again, she’s ok.
I have to say I’ve no complaints.

Now, I’m talking to a friend of Hanna’s.
We’ve been talking about different kinds of grapes.
Now, she is hot, but then again, she’s so bland.
I tilt my head and make a stupid face.

I maintain there’s something to be said for attainable girls.
There’s just something they possess, when they say “yes”.

Attainable chicks! Attainable chicks! I’m talking about girls like a 4, 5, or 6!
Attainable chicks! Attainable chicks! The kind of girls I can get into.

Now, I’m back with my half-cutie from at Atlanta.
We’re talking about how to change disc-brakes.
She laughs and snorts and coughs, and then she touches my hand,
and says, “I’ve got some Keystone back at my place.” Oh yeah!
Track Name: Orange Girls
They’re posing in pictures with all of their girlfriends.
They’re getting very diagonal. It’s was such a great weekend!
Becca looked amazing! Everyone is, like, her biggest fan.
She looked so pretty with the face that launched a thousand tans!

Orange girls! Orange girls! Orange Girls! Giggling pumpkins they are!
Orange girls! Orange girls! Orange Girls! Giggling sluts!

The beach party was so much fun! These girls love to dance!
Some of the girls met some boys. The cute one was Levi, but the hot one was Lance.
Becca is such a badass! She passed out in the sand!
But, she’s so goddamn pretty. She’s so fucking tan!

Kat and Danielle and Becca and Hanna and Jenny and Jess and Brandi and Sandra and Jackie and Ashley and Claire and Savannah and Krista and Kaitlyn and Mandy and Manda.
They were all so amazing! You can’t even understand.
So goddamn pretty! So goddamn tan!
Track Name: Standard Bullshit
I’m sitting on a bench. I’m waiting for a train.
I watch the clouds drift in the San Diego sky.
A woman approaches and sits down next to me.
And her bag falls down and leans against my leg.
She says, “I’m sorry” and then goes on to say that she didn’t want to buy that bag anyway.
She says she only bought it to put her blanket in.
She asks, “Why don’t they make sashes you can carry blankets in?”

This is all true, man. This is the standard bullshit that happens to me all the time.
This particular story happened over ten years ago with the girl that I was dating at the time.

In my life, I’ve met quite a few random people and circumstances, too.
It’s just standard, standard. Standard bullshit. Standard bullshit.

I was sitting on the train watching all those hills roll by.
I was headed down to TJ with my girlfriend at the time,
when the same lady from before made her way back through the train,
and she had something that she just had to explain.
She said, “I’m an old number one in bits and pieces,
but I’ve recently been upgraded to a number two.
And, I’m not saying it’s your fault. You just kind of look like George.”
And, I shit you not. This is exactly how it went.
Track Name: Townie Don't
Townie don’t mind. Townie don’t dance too good.
Townie don’t give a shit. Townie don’t.

Townie don’t give a goddamn about your college degree
or how you got to where you are or where you plan to be.
Townie don’t want to start shit or try to make you leave.
He just wants to ask you and your friends,
“Why the fuck y’all starin’ at me?!”

Townies don’t mind what you do.
Scratch offs! Doral Lights! Heaven Hill! And Diet Rite!
They just want to have a good time, too.
Eatin’ some wings! And smokin’ some kind! I’m havin’ laugh! I’m havin’ a time!

Townie says, “You want a thicker girl. They’re much better in the sack.
“About twenty pounds overweight, likes to keep on her back.”
He’s got a gold Chrysler LeBaron that’s illegally parked out back,
with a bumper sticker that proudly says, “If you can read this you’re too sober!”

Townies don’t mind what you do.
Scratch offs! Doral Lights! Heaven Hill! And Diet Rite!
They just want to have a good time, too.
Eatin’ some wings! And smokin’ some kind! I’m havin’ laugh! I’m havin’ a time!
The bartender at your local Applebee’s.
Fried sides! Extra ranch! Tall glasses! And wide pants!
Don’t give a good goddamn that she’s a townie.
Good hours! And snappy shirts! A lively crowd! And great desserts!
So, take a minute. I want you to spell it out. I want you to explain, in the plainest of terms, why you’re freaking out.
Track Name: Opportunities (To Get Some Play Back in the Day)
Nancy said, “There’s no feeling like having your bed rockin’ on a Sunday afternoon.”
She said this on a Sunday afternoon.
I said, “I’m sorry, but I made plans with my roommate to go to the mall.”

Opportunities to get some play back in the day.
I’ve had more than a few of these pass me by, pass me by.
From the cock-block to the cock-tease, I’ve had my game go down in flames.
These opportunities, I’ve fucked up in style.

A random girl at the bar says, “Please walk home with me. You can keep me warm.”
It was cold that night.
I say, “No that’s cool. My friend drove here tonight. I’ll just go back with him.”

So, let me get your digits. I’ll call you in twenty minutes to see if you wanna come over and fuck.
Don’t use this strategy. It doesn’t work. It never has.
See, cock-blocking myself is something that I am highly skilled at.
I do it almost without effort. I do it almost without thinking.
I’m going home alone. I’m going home alone. Yeah!
Track Name: It's So Bright Out
These markings on my arm don’t make too much sense, a string of drunken hieroglyphs from the night before.
I just woke up on the floor.
All is quiet now. It’s so bright out.

These pictures on my phone tell an incongruous tale of sordid various events outside the library.
Explains the cuts on my knee.
All is quiet now. It’s so bright out.

These markings on my arm are starting come back to me like a drunk Rosetta stone that just came to me.
Just came to me.
All is quiet now. It’s so bright out.

Wake up six feet from the edge of the bed. Slow thumpin’ hallow sound in the back of my head.
One sock on, the other on the night stand. Jeans rolled up, I used them as a pillow man.
Another pint, another shot, another fuckin’ round. Small town broken clown laughed without a sound.
It’s so bright out.
And who are these ghosts that’ll sit and have a drink with me? And why does life have to be this fuckin’ mystery?
Answer’s found at the end of the proverbial glass. I guess this egg’s on my face, ‘cause I thought it could last.
Track Name: Cinema Kumite
There’s a bad boss in town, and he only means to start trouble.
I hear he’s kidnapped the girl, and he’s stealing from the workers.
Something has to be done. Someone should teach him a lesson.
But, his kung fu is much too powerful. There must be someone who can fix him?!
These are the kinds of plot-lines that I can get behind.
I guess that you might say that I’m a student of Cinema Kumite.

Bruce Lee, you taught me so much through your book and your movies.
Like how to chug a raw egg and Jeet Kune Do and to always keep my eyes on my opponent.
But some say the truth lies between Bruce Le and Bruce Li.
But we all know that it really flows through Bolo.

Ten men in white shirts waiting in the background patiently for their turn to get beat up.
Ten men in white shirts with sticks and knives and nunchucks waiting in the background to get beat up.